Fun & Restrictions
just a stone's throw from the Palace of the Supreme Minister, Pickle
Street Market is infamous for its food, cheap goods, and long queues.
food in the market arrives ready-rotten and unfit for healthy consumption,
by-passing the need for the marketers to invest in storerooms and
wait until their wares are ready to fall to pieces before placing
it on their stalls.
the many delights to be found is the infamous Black Outland Apple,
a fruit that grows to the size of a football, with a black cankerous
hard outer shell known to be fatal to the unsuspecting and lead
to the premature wearing of a cardboard coffin.
with these odious exotic fruits are several varieties of Outland
potato that grow in the poisoned earth lines that cut a swathe across
the lands of the eastern coasts. These vegetables are traditionally
scrubbed wearing heavy gloves, boiled to a mush, which is then squeezed
through an extremely fine mesh in a bid to remove most of the nine
hundred and seventy-three known pollutants that inhabit them.
all the potatoes available, Eastern Commons are the most popular
variety. They are cheap and plentiful due to their short gestation
period. They take only seven days from planting to harvest, thanks
to the skill of the Citizen-Scientists at the Genetic Mutation Research
Council, and are used by City food emporiums to make chippes,
a delicacy where globules of potato mush are formed into rectangles
and deep-fried in dog lard.
Street Market: Culture & Street Entertainment
When the market closes for the day, the traders go off to the pub,
leaving behind the traditional array of rotting fruit and vegetables,
paper bags, and other tantalising assortments of foods mingled with
indescribable mounds of other matter over the roadway and pavements.
just after closing time, they stagger out of the pubs and partake
in Street-Brawls, a tradition with a long history dating
back to Year Zero, involving Hedbutts, Gonadkiking,
and other humorous violence, often slipping on the rotting mush
of food and fracturing their skulls and cracking bones. A delight
for the whole family!
Food poisoning from Outland fruit and vegetables is a major cause
of death in the City of Empires, and attained first place in the
fatality charts alongside Arrest and Interrogation by the OSS.
figures, however, are before the numerous fatalities from the fast
food stores are taken into account, with the Big Banquet Burger
chain and Kevin's Kebab Kingdom being the major contenders
for the food fatality crown.
has become a matter of immense pride for hardened members of the
City populace to regularly eat from these most dangerous of venues
and still live to tell the tale to strangers. Make sure you take
your family on a tour of dangerous eateries!
to report a crime, allowing a crime to take place, or being victim
of a crime through carelessness or incompetence, constitutes committing
Party is watching. The Party is listening. The Party knows all.